Not sure why I would buy a jacket that has been, “reconfigured for garden use”. But I did. That’s Japanese brand Sassafras’ ethos, it’s angle if you will – gardening. But like, no one’s going to drop a couple of ton on a jacket then get it all up in the weeds and nettles though surely? I’m not. The only thing ‘green’ my Sassafras jacket is going anywhere near is tea. And even that’s a lie. I like normal tea. And Battenburg. And Tunnocks chocolate teacakes.

So I done gone and wrote about this jacket before. It was only a few days ago. I got myself so excited by my own writing on this jacket, I went and bought it. I basically sold myself this jacket. That’s something brands should consider. Don’t advertise stuff. Just encourage everyone on the planet to write drivel about stuff they want and they’ll excite themselves into buying it. There’s probably a couple of issues to iron out in the implementation of that plan. But hey, every global brand in existence, I’m here to help.

I’m pairing this horticultural blouson with a vintage vest. Or waistcoat, if you must. I grabbed it in Brighton for 30 quid, which makes it 60 quid cheaper than the exact same thing over in London’s (admittedly aces) Vintage Showroom. It’s a shooting vest and those little elasticated bits you can see on there are for shotgun cartridges.

Full of contradictions this outfit really. I’m about as interested in shooting as I am gardening. Which is to say, I’d rather shatter my own knees with a toffee hammer than do either of them.