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An alarming miscellany

Check out the loon bags on this brotherman. Those are some enthusiastically cropped trousers right there. And look at the hems. You could lose a baby in that floating wilderness of fabric. You’ve got to admire it. The guy is simultaneously inside and outside his own comfort zone. Which is not easy to do. Most of it is down to those terrifying child catcher pants. But look deeper. There’s a more interesting Kaptial piece playing a part in this alarming miscellany.

Looking like a botched game of pin the pockets on the jacket, what we’ve got here is a lightweight cotton throw on, with highly questionable storage positioning. I mean, outside of being purposely maladroit, why put pockets high up on the back?

Could you rescue your lighter from one of those with any dignity? You strain to reach over your shoulder. Then attempt under an arm pit. Then, in furious recognition at the absurdity of a garment you paid money for, begin to wildly claw at your own clothes. Ultimately, more beast than man, you are rolling on the floor, red faced, punching your coat. James Bond it is not.

If we conveniently ignore the potential indignity, we can probably agree it’s a cool piece. No fastening though. Which is weird. Just two pockets on the back, some sleeves, a front bit and, well… make of it what you will.

Perhaps your current wardrobe is a bit too functional? Maybe you find it tiresome, the ease with which you can navigate the putting on of a trouser say. Or the tedious simplicity of reaching for your wallet, or buttoning your jacket. If so, I’d suggest this piece could provide the kind of impractical, maddening nonsense you sorely need.

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