Does this sound familiar? You get togged up for a jaunt down the cafe, shops, bar… You take a final mirror check, then you realise you look too put together? You’ve got the brown shoes, the blue trousers, the top with a bit of brown and blue in it and a blue jacket. Dude, you’re styled. You’re J Crew man. You’re all considered and shit. You look like you’ve been thinking far too deep. Mr Sympathetic Palette is not the fire.
Emergencies like that, call for a bag like this.
Course, I’m not saying that by adding this psychotropic grocery bag to any old vanilla look will get you papped outside Pitti. But if you’re looking for something that torpedos your stylistic instincts and gets you out of a catalogue-man quagmire, this is it.
It’s from South2 West8 and is available now over at Chicken Shack. Chew up and spit out a healthy mouthful of Jelly Beans and you’d get a decent approximation of the colour mix here. It’s typical of the brand’s subversion of traditional hunting ‘n’ fishing attire – it’d look more at home bouncing on someone’s hip in a 90s Blackburn rave than stuffed with Bradshaws Fancys for a peaceful day on the banks of the Ouse. But that’s the point here.
You need a bit of ‘what the fuck’ in your wardrobe. Something to terrify your greys, browns and navys. Something to make it appear you’ve not spent time thinking about your look. Even though, in truth, that’s all you ever do.