The fresh, crisp feel of all-over raw denim. Impliable, cardboardy and (for gentlemen of the pint) harrowing around the midriff. Of course, you’ve got to buy raw denim jeans a bit small, because after a while they stretch to mirror the shape of your tumescent gut. They’re all the same, APCs, Albam, Han Kjøbenhavn… When you first buy them they strangle your waist – making a tucked-in shirt billow like an Elizabethan blouse. But after a few weeks of sitting down (and all that pressure from your burger basket) they start to give. Finally, you’ll be able to take them off without undoing them. Which obviously gets the ladies going.

Fresh out the brown paper though, raw denim is a satisfying wear. In turn, paunch throttling and sharp. Rich in saturated colour and yet to develop abrasions or erosion. The smartest of all the denims. And the all-over wearer will swing between feeling daringly cool and a bit like a modern day Tin Man. Only made of jeans.

No idea where this Universal Works Workshop Denim thing sprang from? One minute the U-Dubs are banging out pastel T-shirts, the next they’re getting all artisanal with the 13oz Portuguese selvedge. Either way, it looks power-strong to me. As soon as I saw that chore jacket, I knew I wanted one. The irregular pockets, the plain buttons and, yeah boi… that salvage detail on the front – I need a slice of this madness.

Just look at the bro above. Look how inquisitive he is about that button. That’s how to wear a jacket right there. Stumbling from Dalston bar to Dalston bar, head-to-toe in inflexible denim, with an expression that suggests he’s trying to recall the words to a lost love letter, while fiddling with his button. Mournful man. Fucking mournful.

And look at this situation right here…

Hold tight girls. This is some serious unwashed, right hand twill action coming at you. Can any one man take on this much yardage of denim and come out victorious? What kind of women has the confidence to try and steal this guy’s rope dyed indigo heart?

There’s a regular and slimmer fit jean in the range and a Trucker jacket too. So head over to Universal Works and get kitted out. And remember, raw denim jeans stretch. So size down. Even if you have to use a shoe horn to tuck your shirt in.