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Braying, ruddy-faced lumps

I don’t like rugby. I don’t understand how it works. I don’t understand why the process of putting a ball in a hole, or touching a stick or whatever, while some other men try and stop you is of any interest to anyone? Also, why do people who like rugby have to be so fucking loud? And tall? If ever I have the misfortune to enter a pub when the ‘rugby’s on’ I can’t move for enormous-arsed burgundy jeans and canoe-like deck shoes. You squeeze through to order a pint and get your face simultaneously swatted by ten different quiffs; all attached to over-excitable, braying, ruddy-faced lumps, whose wives have let them out, seemingly to laugh as loudly as possible about ‘bumming’. Christ I hate rugby.

It’s a shame these Nanamica shirts are inspired by rugby. Because, as I say, I think it’s shit.

Soft jersey cotton, three button fastening, woven collar: thems your details. And they’re nice shirts. A little on the conservative side perhaps, but teamed with something a little more outré, I think they could work. The baggy Needles trousers I spotlighted the other day would work.

I mean, not everything in your wardrobe has to scream, “I’m an intolerable narcissist who only wears brands you’ve never heard of.” Most things do obviously. But there’s still room for more simple pieces, pieces that hang-back in your fit, pieces indifferent to attention.

Let’s not ignore the fact that these shirts do have stripes on though. They’re not invisible, just kind of familiar. I expect they might look interesting clashed up with camo. Or maybe beneath a wrinkly, unstructured cotton suit. I suppose you could even wear it to the pub to watch the latest match of rugby ball. Just remember to accessorise with deafening near-the-knuckle ‘bantz’ and a complete disregard for other patrons.

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