Pre-dishevelled jeans, be they sand-blasted, scribbled on, or God forbid, ripped, are frequently a disaster area. Witness the legions of regional Don Juan’s in calf-clinging abominations; slashed at the knees, throttling at the ankles. That they go sockless in winter, with flimsy ASOS plimsolls or pointy loafers framing their ivory ankles merely adds to the shambles. Taken alone, the jeans are shit enough.

So what to make of a pair like these? They’re hardly disco-bar regulation skinnies. Plus they’re from Japanese casual wear boffins Bru Na Boinne – which is cool. On the other hand, they appear to have been an unwilling participant at a bukake party.

Over at retailer Digital Mountain they address (via Google Translate) the pleasing, “wide silhouette” and on the embellishment they say, “the beautiful bleach completed naturally in the work process is expressed as ‘art'”. And you know what, I’m inclined to agree. It’s certainly preferable to imagining ten cocks trumpeting yards of molten spooge.

I’m thinking that worn with a chunky pair of loafers (maybe Yuketen) a simple navy top/shirt and perhaps a long line overcoat these jeans would kill. Like I say, I’d smarten them with a shoe, rather than a sneaker and keep the top half plain, making the jeans take point on your look. But that’s just me. You could go the other way by looping on a bunch of beads and bangles and getting all tie-dye up top. You’d look like the CEO of a wind chime start-up, but maybe that’s a thing.