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An extra in your own life

Everyone has their own comfort level when it comes to standing out. Too gaudy? You’re self-aware, everyone’s checking you out, you feel like a dick. But too subtle (and regular readers will surely get this) you’re an extra in your own life; you’re background noise; no one’s even clocking your triple-stitched pouch-pocket. Miserable.

This TS(S) coat sits precisely equidistant between inconspicuous and dickery – at least from my perspective. Simultaneously bold and subtle; it has something to say, but it’s not going to keep texting if you don’t respond. And rest easy, it’s literally not possible to look a dick in this. Yes, this coat is different, unusual even and yes, it will get you noticed. But anyone taking against this, anyone making ‘jokes’ about wearing a quilt or some such, is simply a massive bell. They may not know it. But they definitely are. This is coat is a thing of beauty. Anyone that doesn’t see that is an irrelevance.

The pattern might seem familiar. That’s because we looked at a TS(S) top, in the same style, but in a different colour way a couple of weeks back. The top is good, this coat is another level entirely. The tonal personality of bramble jelly and the interlocking circles of a tedious powerpoint – from what strange components magic is made. And the fabric. It’s a nylon/poly; a little shiny, crinkled and puckered like a screen siren’s negligée.

As befits this kind of deluxe utilitarianism the price will cause you physical injury. You’ll need a good £670 and that’s not even including the cost of having it imported into your lifestyle. But as parkas go, this is a supreme example. You will never see anyone else in the same coat. And even if you did, I can guarantee they won’t be a dick.

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