You ever make yourself a coffee. Then leave it for a a few minutes. Then forget it’s coffee and think you made a tea. Then take a sip and for a billisecond go, “christ, what the fuck is that?” Then realise it’s coffee?

So, anyway, there’s this tie.

I love ties. I rarely buy ties. But every so often, a tie comes along that straddles the worlds of formality and casuality so unexpectedly, so fluently, that my senses awaken, and I am swaddled in a vibrant emotional resonance, and, while in the moment, I submit to feculence.

That doesn’t happen. But fuck me, this is a big tie. It’s by Koromo and new brand over at Blue Button Shop. The beautiful dying technique has produced an astonishing, speckled, seemingly erratic pattern that’s about as far away from diseased Tie Rack horribleness as is possible to be.

Surely, it’d kill suited, at a wedding, but it’s also banging enough to make me want to re-investigate the casual denim shirt and tie manoeuvre – a look I haven’t troubled since the late 80s. This is a tie that will get comments. So, if your personal brand hasn’t been nourished by any transparently envious comments lately, buy this now. Your ego will thank me.