Do you find the flute a bit mainstream? Prefer the sound of the piccolo? Bet you like the mandolin right? Do you shave a bit of bark into your salad? And if you went to Bath, you’d drink the spa water right? And enjoy it. You’d have two glasses, even though it tastes like filth. You’re in the right place folky bro. You probably want to be swagging Visvim, but your beaded purse is too light. So for your hirsue consideration I offer these tricked out Converse.

95 quid will buy you your desired look. One that says you built your own home from wattle and daub, you forage for salad in hedgerows and teach the clavichord. Yeah brah, you’re rocking all sorts of Catweazle.

I think played down with some loose raw denim and navy wool, these 1970’s Hi, with their raised foxing, extra padded insole and a reinforced sole unit could be pulled off. They certainly look like a luxe take on the standard Con’ – that folky stitching and tan trim is going to get brother inducted into the magic circle no question.

In the wrong hands of course – teamed with white jeans and a tight T – you’re gonna be putting a severe Rod, Jane and Freddy game out there. Full-power children’s entertainer chic. Which, to be fair, might be what you’re after. That Mr Tumble must be raking it in. I expect the birds go mad for him. He looks the type.