Elasticated trousers used to be a joke — mostly spotted in the old folk’s ads in the back of the Daily Express. Perforated leather slip-ons, motorised awnings and yes, rubbery waistbands; a boon for the arthritically fingered. The only other market demanding a similarly pliable midsection was (and presumably remains) the uncommonly vast. Gentlemen with so much pork on the loin that regular trousers simply can’t cope.
It’s unclear when this particular trouser fastening moved from Viz piss-take to highly desirable. At some point during the frenzy of the last ten years — the global explosion in men’s fashion, the rise of athleisure, the west through the eastern lens, the continual hybridisation of menswear’s past and future — elasticated trousers just felt right again. No jokes about, “having room for your pints.” No suggestions that you’d come out in your pyjamas. All of a sudden the stretchy pant was simply part of the landscape. Their former life as a punchline apparently erased.
If you don’t have a number of perfect examples in your arsenal already (or even if you do) this pair from Mfpen deserves a look. Especially as they’re half price, with small, medium and large sizes still available. Previously €200, they’re now €100, which is around 90 of your Majesty’s quids.
They’re nice and baggy, with a slightly cropped hem. Get your tape measure out to be safe, but at first glance the crop doesn’t look too severe. And they’ve got a couple of large patch pockets at the rear. Ideal for the classic double-handed back pocket slouch – are you a wastrel, or just above it all? Fucking textbook.
You’ve really got to love the double pleats here. Are they smart? Are they fuck. Or are they? They’re enough to puzzle your mum and positively bewilder your grandma. In fact you may find such family members have quite the opinion. You could have got three pairs, in three different colours, for £14.99, out the back of the Express, they might say. And then the choice is yours. You can either nod appreciatively, or get into a massive back and forth about how they don’t understand proper clothes like you do, how these are nothing like shitty newspaper trousers and men’s style is a big thing now, and… stop laughing at me, oh just shut up the pair of you, leave me alone… before storming out in a huff to finish your coffee under the motorised awning.