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Eastlogue: a new leader will rise

Good to see Eastlogue offering pieces outside their typical palette of navy, olive and beige. Proper stoner territory this. Maybe the brand have been inspired by LA’s none-more-bongo Online Ceramics. Or is it just a reaction to the virus? This looks like the uniform of a new religion?

Think about it. After months of Loose Women and Cash in the Attic your mind’s going to start eating itself. Your intellect will perish beneath the teeth of stupidity; you’ll start to argue that Love Is Blind is an important sociological experiment; Boris Johnson will sound plausible.

Then you’ll be completely susceptible. A new leader will rise. A Pastor. American. Dressed in a top like this. Probably some beads. He’ll speak to us all through Zoom video conferences. He’ll teach us not to fear the virus, but to embrace it. But not before transfering our savings to his church.

I can totally see this happening. Surely somewhere there’s some immoral blowhard dreaming up some new theological clap-trap. I mean, I have you seen The Leftovers?

In truth I don’t expect the entire cult to be wearing this exact top. It’s too expensive for one. At £195 it’s only for the high priests. It’s pretty nice though. High count cotton, chest pockets, drawcord at the hem and what’s called a ‘keyhole’ collar — if I was buying clothes now, rather than hoarding my shekels for the collapse of society, I’d be all over this.

Of course, it’s designed for maximum casuality. But I’d be inclined to wear it over a striped shirt, with a navy blazer over the top. Mixed signals bro. Am I simply a debonair creative, or have I come to steal your first born? Mark my words, there’ll be a wicker man in Trafalgar Square before this is over.

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