Capturing the twin perils of oversized check and smock, this monster from Kaptain Sunshine is pure weapon. Smocks are difficult. I tried a plain navy cotton one on in Present once, took one look and removed it  – I looked like I should be puffing on a clay pipe while operating a ducking stool. But that one was too baggy. This one is more trim, more shortly cropped. It’s pretty tempting. And at least with that loud check there’d be no confusing me with a Hammer Horror extra.

I like how, length-wise, there’s scope for a white tee to poke out. The pull-tie details around the neck and hem would also stop things getting too out of hand.

Still, there’s no getting away from the fact this this a smock. Not a sweater. Or a generic top. It’s a smock, look at that boaty neck. And, depending on the sophistication level of your friendship circle, it’d be likely to encourage comments about chewing on straw, and selling your cow for a bag of beans, all the way through to jovial suggestions of beastiality and incest.

I think I’d be prepared to take the hit for this piece. I’d be less worried about the smockishness, than the ferociousness of that giant check though – not sure I’ve got the personality for it. I’d probably try and tame it with with loose jeans and maybe something thrown over it in the colder months. I’d just make sure I left my Medieval torture equipment at home.