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Rounded and bulbous

I’m just going to jump to the assumption that the weird flappy, lace-hole thing on these boots is a heritage detail to do with pole climbing. I might be wrong. But then the internet is full of wrong. That said, I am basing my opinion on two things. Firstly, these are made by White’s (specifically for Nepenthes) a manufacturer of specialised workwear boots. And secondly, they’re called the ‘Poleclimber’. Deduction deduced. I’m like Vera, but with menswear.

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They’re tan, made of heavy rough suede, they’re available only on the Japanese Nepenthes site and they might be sold out, I can’t tell, I don’t speak Japan. Doesn’t matter really. Do you know how much 128,000 yen is in British? It’s 740 large. 740 large quids. And that’s large enough.

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Even so, I would like these more than it’s reasonable to like a rough suede shoe. The chunky Vibram sole is banging and the silhouette, all rounded and bulbous, would look the complete shit with a pair of  wide, rolled up EG Workaday pants. I’m not sure what else to say. If by some quirk of happenstance you actually own these, I prostrate myself before you in awe of your taste. If you don’t, then I’m guessing you never will. And nor will I. So that’s that solved.

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