comment 0

Dusen Dusen: Forget catching Zzzs… it’s pillow fight king or nothing 

At least things are clearer now. Depending on which doctor or politician you happen to be listening to at the time, lockdown is either going to start relaxing in March, or continue forever. It’s the kind of British exceptionalism that makes me wonder if those Brexiteers weren’t onto something. That, and being charged £57 import duty for a pair of Parisian shoes last week.

I guess paying more to import something from France than, say, Japan, is all part of the grand plan. I assume we’re just lulling the world into a false sense of security before really showing them the grand Brexit vision. It will take a minute though, first we have to lay off all the fishermen, relocate small businesses to the EU and close the car factories. Only then will we have those foreigners where we really want them.

Anyway. It appears lockdown isn’t going anywhere any time soon. So none of us are going anywhere any time soon. Probably time to get robed-up. If we can’t promenade around outside in our bestest-bestest, then at least we can lounge inside in a bold stripy gown, doing bad Terry Thomas impressions.

This robe is from Dusen Dusen, a Brooklyn outfit dedicated to all things cosy and malleable  — towels, poufs, throws, sweatsuits. Bold geometrics are the flavour, further enhanced with atomic colour-clashing. It’s available in dazzling red and purple, or green and white. Forget catching Zzzs, this thing will keep you awake  — it’s pillow fight king or nothing.

Personally my robe game is weak. I’ve got a couple of Dusen Dusen towels, so can speak to the softness of the Portuguese cotton. But robe-wise I’m bereft. I just idle about the house in my PVC vest and stainless steel chastity device like most blokes. I could do with one of these  — something to kick back in, maybe read a little P.G. Wodehouse, while tapping my cigarette holder into the yucca.

To be honest, I’ve already gone on such a Covid spree that the infected are not the only coffers that need attention  — I’m broke. I can’t in good conscience drop one-and-a-half on a robe right now. Besides, my girl wants one too. That’s 300 bar to look like a pair of Chewits. Love ’em, but not for now I think. Besides, they’re currently available at End in Newcastle; I expect there’s some new Brexit tax to get them imported to London.

Leave a Reply