Putting to one side Thursday’s meltdown, let’s get back on the sartorial horse. What better way to ring in the new year than with an animal of a piece — a sweatshirt that’ll snarl as you pull it on and try to take a bite out of your chin. It’ a grotesque beauty; diseased with colour, schizophrenic of fabric. This is what 2020 looks like. You’re welcome to it.
It’s from Kapital of course. The Japanese brand with a heritage skill set and the mind of a 1000 serial killers. And yes, it’s oversized, features tie-dye and a synthetic fluorescent back. And yes, ‘clang-clang’ that’s the sound of your brain warning get-me-the-fuck-out-of-here-I’m-never-going-to-wear-that. But hang on a second. I’m constantly hearing the phrase, ‘that won’t suit me’, or worse, ‘that won’t suit you.’ But what does that actually mean? Unless you’re as big a horse box, as far as I can make out, what suits someone, is what they wear all the time. If you only wear Champion casual-wear, to you, this sweat will look like the contents of Hieronymus Bosch’s nappy. If on the other hand, you’re no stranger to colour and enjoy poking the perimeter of your taste, this is a bingo. Kapital makes some challenging stuff, no doubt. But seriously, the ice caps are melting, homeless kids starve in the UK and Iran is planning its retaliation, I suspect a grown man can get away with a giant purple and yellow sweatshirt.
I do genuinely think that outside of attending a Klaxons reunion gig, this piece still has worth. As is my way, I’d defuse some of its power beneath a navy wool overcoat — only exposing the full enriched uranium core at my most relaxed or heavily pissed. I started writing this post 32 minutes ago and the more I’ve looked at this top, the more I fear it. But also, perversely, the more I love it. It’s seductive but terrifying. Perfect perhaps for these days of maximum dread.