These Suicoke boots have a 100% cow suede upper, a nylon lining, an EVA antibacterial footbed, and a tomato red lacing and toggle system at the back. But they look a bit like UGGs.

Are you a 20 year old, east London fine art student, who wears Crocs out to a bar? Do you respond to inquisition by simply saying, they’re comfortable –  contrary to your deeply considered and transparent anti-fashion, ironic reclamation? If so, you can probably get away with these. Although actually you’d probably prefer actual UGGs? Second hand ones. More grimy. Less bouji. Like, countercultural and shit, yeah?

Assuming you’re not planning to tramp around Shoreditch in your mum’s UGGs, carrying your screen prints to another apathetic gallery, you might fancy these. I like them. Suicoke products are superbly made and no doubt they’d be comfortable. I can see them, looking strong, poking beneath some lightly rolled, wide-cut hems; that’d be a thing right?

The detail-minded will appreciate the rear lacing scenario. It’s grandiose, attention seeking stuff.  In my view, you’d have to be pretty visually ignorant to mistake these for the shit Blake Lively used to wear.

£160 over at Goodhood will get you involved. Involved in comfort certainly. Involved in a supple, bulbous booted style the Japanese manage to pull off so effortlessly. And, sadly I dare say, involved in being asked by 900 dunces a day why you’re wearing UGGs.