Without wishing to sound hyperbolic, there is nothing like a very large pair of trousers. A sausage casserole is nothing like a very large pair of trousers. Neither is a VHS copy of Tango and Cash. I suppose you could argue that a reasonably large pair of trousers is a bit like a very large pair of trousers, but if you’re going to get all literal on me I’ll just jog on slapping my ears so I can’t hear.  This is a very large pair of trousers by Too Good. And as we’ve established, there’s nothing else like them.

Too Good is a London based unisex brand who specialise in an austere, loose-fitting hybrid of utilitarianism and conceptual thinking. It’s a brand I’d chose for perching at a bar, pretending to read Baudrillard while sneering at a group of office lads wearing Dune brogues.

The sheer volume of these wax cotton trousers is quite something to behold. They’re probably more trouser than the average blokesman would be prepared to take on. You can grab them over at Japanese retailer Acoustics who via the medium of a wrecking ball and the English language sum them up thus: “Although it is unique design and sizing, it is a balanced pants.” I like the challenge of balanced pants myself. Although I don’t think I’d go all the way with the rope belt. Bit too ‘Derelicte’ for me.