So I’ve been wondering if my penchant for the bucket hat will see me through winter? Or whether I’ll have to resort to an approximation of the beanie, the kind everyone pulls on before the first flake of snow has dissolved in a puddle. It turns out, I’m in luck. I can keep warm and continue to look ridiculous with this offering from Câbleami.

Stick some googly eyes on this bad boy and it wouldn’t look out of place in the soft toy department at Hamleys – it’s like a skirmish between a Kangol and Fozzie Bear. Still, I reckon these something kind of cool about it –  “yeah brah, I’m wearing a fucking cuddly toy… and…?”

At 80 coins it won’t kill you to give it a try. But there’s no question, it’s a statement. Even dressed down, there’d be no escaping you’ve got a seriously shaggy headpiece going on. Then again, busting such a tactile and cushiony hat might subliminally imply you have a pleasantly tactile, cuchiony demeanour. And ladies will love you for it. And become all amorous. And approach you suggesting intercourse. I expect that will probably definitely happen.