100% wool. 100% made in Japan. 100% lunatic. One could argue that what we are looking at here is a coat made of different coloured panels. But one would be duped. Bamboozled by one’s own eyes – as Aristotle pointed out, “our senses can be trusted but they can be easily fooled”. Theoretically, when we view something our brains try to predict the future, compensating for the minuscule delay between a thing and our conscious perception of it. There is a short lag as a signal travels to the brain to be processed. That doesn’t affect me though as I’ve got pretty good eyesight and a fucking nimble mind. I can see this is not in fact a coat made of different coloured panels, but a living consciousness of dark matter, completely invisible to the electromagnetic spectrum. Like something Dr Strange might do.

As if that wasn’t interesting enough, it’s on sale. And it’s from Mr Gentleman, a brand no one sells in the UK. So winner on all fronts really. Excepting perhaps that you’d have to wear it.

It’s a bombastic piece no doubt. Not especially typical of the usual Japanesey/Americana Takeshi Ohsumi’s brand offers, but it’s a startling and welcome diversion. And probably a little dangerous. There’s no question it’s got the Medusa effect. Anyone directly looking at it is going to fry some neurons. And anyone putting it on? It would instantly send even the most scientific mind entirely foolish.