You know how we don’t use the word ‘fat’ to describe people who are fat? Instead, we say they’re ‘heavy’. I was wondering, does that apply to jeans? Because without question, these are the fattest ass denims I’ve ever seen.

I don’t mean to cause offense to jeans ‘of size’, anyway, you know, there are probably a load of bros who are mad attracted to that scene… But for me, this is way too much ass.

I’m not sure who you have to be to pull off such a non-trivial rear?  I guess a smiley, courteous looking Japanese hipster?

I just love that the back pockets sit way down on the leg. For all I know, they might be the most comfortable jeans ever made? I’ll never find out though. I’d look like I’d followed through like a queasy shire horse. Not really my look for SS14.

I’ve gots to notify you all that at this stage, I’m out. But if you want to go it alone, you can pick up a pair of these Lee x Mercibeaucoup colabs over at Zozotown. Choice is yours brah. For me, 120 quid is a bit more than I want to pay to look like I’m walking round with a nappy full of manure under my trousers.